When you see someone on a street corner or huddling in a doorway, what is your first instinct? For many of us, it’s a mix of guilt, confusion, or even fear. We want to help, but we don’t know how—so we often look away.
At Christ in the City, our experience has shown that the deepest poverty of homelessness isn’t just a lack of shelter or food. It is a poverty of the heart. It is the all-encompassing experience of being unknown, unloved, and unwanted. Ultimately, homelessness is a rupture of relationships.
If you want to know how to help homeless people in a way that truly restores hope, the answer starts with a simple, human encounter.
In this video, Shayla and Blake from Christ in the City share practical tips on how to move past the “fix-it” mentality and build real friendships with the poor.
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Before you approach someone, it helps to set the right stage. You don’t need a degree in social work to make a difference; you just need to be present.
Set Realistic Expectations: You’re probably going to feel awkward. That’s okay! Starting a conversation with a stranger is rarely seamless. We embrace that discomfort for the sake of love.
Begin with Prayer: Before you step out, say a quick “Come Holy Spirit.” Remember that God has already placed the desire in your heart to reach out; His grace is enough for the moment.
Stay Safe: Always get a good read of your surroundings. if a situation looks unsafe, avoid it. Whenever possible, bring a friend along with you.
The first few seconds of an interaction are the most important for lowering guards and establishing trust.
The “Gift” of an Item: It is helpful to have something small on hand—like a pair of socks or a bottle of water. This gives you a reason to approach and immediately signals that you are there to give, not to take.
The Gift of Your Name: This is the most important step. Offer your name first: “Hi, I’m Blake. What’s your name?” * Use Their Name: Many people on the streets go weeks without hearing their own name spoken. By asking and remembering it, you are telling them, “I see you. You matter.”
How do you have a conversation with someone whose life experience is so different from yours? It’s simpler than you think. They are humans with stories, hobbies, and pasts. If you get stuck, remember the acronym HOPE:
H – Hobbies: What do they like to do? What did they enjoy in the past?
O – Occupations: What kind of work have they done?
P – Places: Are they from the area? Where have they traveled?
E – Endearment: Ask about family, friends, or people they care about.
Don’t be afraid to find common ground. Just like any other friend, you’re looking for a connection.
To keep the encounter focused on the person’s dignity, keep these three “don’ts” in mind:
Avoid the “Fix-it” Mentality: When someone shares a struggle, resist the urge to offer immediate solutions. Often, they aren’t looking for a “fixer”; they are looking for a witness. Be fully present in their suffering rather than trying to take it away.
Avoid the Preaching Mentality: Get to know the person before trying to persuade them of your beliefs. Let your actions speak for themselves first.
Avoid Debating: Keep the focus on your relationship. Politics and religious debates have their place, but the first priority is to love the person in front of you.
The path to healing the root of homelessness begins with building healthy relationships—one encounter at a time. You may not feel like you’re changing the world by society’s standards, but for that one person, you are changing everything.
Your Challenge: This week, take a step out of your comfort zone. Use the tips above to make one new friend in your community who is experiencing homelessness
Learning how to help our friends on the street is a journey, not a one-time event. If you want to stay inspired and receive practical tips, stories of encounter, and mission updates directly from the heart of our community, we invite you to subscribe to Word on the Street.
